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Posts Tagged ‘compare’


.f.r.i.e.n.d.s.
Originally uploaded by .krish.Tipirneni.

Desi inquisitiveness is a complex phenomenon, ridden with emotional highs and lows,replete with dramatic twists and turns. Peskiness, curiosity and an unbound spirit of inquiry go a long way in trying to satiate this inquisitiveness.

Not that desis mean to be overly enthusiastic with their inquiries; it is just that their well-intentioned selves care so much for you , that the proverbial nose-poke into your business turns out to be as feeble as having a feisty festoon.

The inquisitiveness also happens to be selfless, with the inferred information and the carefully deduced conclusions shared amongst fellow pursuers of knowledge. The experienced experts throw in their own enlightened judgments into the mix and the purists apply a liberal dose of “Indian traditions” on top of those judgments.

In the factors that inform these conclusions; education, caste, achievements, job, salaray levels, relationship status and religion figure prominently. The connections drawn between these are bizarre yet probable; flippant,yet elaborate. Sample this : “How can someone who only has a bachelors degree, not be from a lower caste and have a white girlfriend, when they just got laid-off ?!!?”

If you are subjected to desi inquisitiveness, you are walking on a fine line between desi adulation and desi abhorrence and there is no real recipe to successfully negotiate through it. Conform or take a stance. In case you decide on the latter, don’t reveal it all at once in the interest of keeping everyone hooked. Desis like to play it like a video game – just enough challenge and just enough reward, at all times.

If all else fails, you can always huddle with other desis. On the other hand, if you want to kick-off your own career in the curiosity business, you just need find the flame within you and start bartering information.

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Liz Hurley and Arun Nayar
Originally uploaded by Heat Mag

Desis, as a community, adore desi-white interracial couples. They are in fact perceived as huge success stories like some sort of compensation for everything that went wrong with desis since the British Raj. If you read between the lines, the blockbuster Lagaan has two prizes for the Indians: the tax-rebates, of course. But more importantly Elizabeth Russel, the commanding officer’s good-hearted sister.

As much as these couples are adored, they are also deeply envied at an individual level. When a desi spots a desi-white couple, he/she runs a comparison algorithm almost instantaneously. The algorithm would start off by comparing visually obvious things like height, build, color of the skin, looks, sense of dressing, hairstyle and then eventually the most important attribute: Accent.

A binary tree is then put in place to determine if he/she is an ABCD or a just-desi. ABCDs will be largely left alone at this point. Just-desis, however, will be put through a series of further tests which include how fake or real the accent is, any clues as to since how long in US, any ‘eclectic’ hobbies like guitar-playing, been to a top school like Stanford or Berkeley, 6-digit salary, or works for a reputed firm and other similar questions that are deeply related to the desi framework of defining personal identity.

A mental spreadsheet is then put in place with two columns, one obviously being him/herself. The outcome of the spreadsheet varies from “This is stupid, I should be able to do it too” to “Looks like an IIT bred and so way out-of-league”.

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